DH had a sort of interview with company #2. It sounded like things there are on shaky ground yet, like there might be some major growing pains about to happen like they did with company #1 several years ago when he started with them. These were preliminary interviews, more like feeling things out, not final interviews.

They did talk a little about benefits, but not too much on specifics. It's a high deductible medical plan. The 401K is decent with a 100% match on the first 3% and a 50% match on the second 3%, so if you put in 6% in a year, you'd get a 4.5% total match on that. It didn't sound like wages were discussed at all. Any job offers (for anyone) won't be forthcoming for several weeks.

It's not the best news, but it is better than no news, I guess. I still hope that DH will get an interview for the job next county over when they start the process mid to late July. That is the better job by far in every category. An interview and then gets hired. That's the holy grail right now.

At the moment, I don't even know if he has work after this hitch. I don't think his company knows either. Stressful. I miss not living in a state of peace.

DH went down for an interview with the job placement company this morning and it seems like it went really well. I hope he gets to work through them because they offer incredible benefits. It has a 401K that matches up to 4% (we have no matching at all with current job). It has medical insurance that is $25 a week per family, not per individual, and a $1000 deductible, again per family, not per individual. And honestly if it was per individual, it'd still be better than anything I've seen in decades.

It looks promising and they are sending his resume to a few places that are seeking his skill set. I really hope that the one next county over will work out, even if they aren't hiring until sometime in July. There's another one that will be hiring in September that sounds good, too, and a couple other places as well.

We still don't know anything about company 2, either, who is taking over the contract at the end of this month from DH's company 1. It is sounding like DH will have a job through August with company 1 at least if he doesn't find a better one sooner. If he can stay steadily employed until getting hired elsewhere that would be so good, especially if that elsewhere is the job in the next county over.

I am afraid to be hopeful. My attitude is kind of "Don't show me pretty things I can't have," right now, but I am trying to remain positive. Because those pretty things (the insurance, the 401K) are things I really, really, really do want to have. Not to mention feeling like the future is secure again.

Continued prayers, good vibes, and crossed fingers would be appreciated.

I am trying really hard not to be stressed out, but it isn't really working. I am grinding my teeth so hard while I am sleeping that I am starting to wear a spot down on my mouth guard and the right side of my jaw hurts really bad from it.

I've also noticed my anxiety is going up. I'm doing things I usually only do during a high state of stress, like picking at my cuticles until they bleed or my OCD stuff getting a little out of control, where instead of having to do things twice it is more like doing it six or eight times (never an odd number, because my OCD is linked to doing things in pairs). So far it is mostly confined to checking my alarm clock or that all the doors are locked or windows are shut over and over, but I can feel it starting to shift into other things. Not good.

So far I am not stress eating at all. I think the phentermine is really helping with that. And I am losing weight, so the stress is not affecting that. I was sick for about five days (stomach bug, fever, dizziness), so I haven't been to the pool in over a week. I am mostly better, but still dizzy and dizzy and water don't mix. The exercise usually helps keep the OCD down (although I do have to swim an even number of laps on swimming days). I hope to get to the pool this weekend, though.

I did walk the mall today. My foot was regretting it afterwards, but not my knee or hip, which is progress. I did one lap of the mall, which is only 1/4 mile, but that's a lot further than usual. The only other time I usually walk that much is in doing a lap of Costco and that's a lot slower than this was. I have been walking a bit. Usually only one to two blocks, but I am trying to build up that strength in my knee again. Some days are good, some are bad, but I haven't needed the cane in about a month. The bad leg is why I do so much in the pool instead, but I miss walking.

The garden is producing really well. Right now I am getting broccoli, scallions, lettuce, kale, sorrel, herbs, and the snap peas are just starting. I've gotten 10 so far, but tomorrow or the next day there should be a lot more, maybe even enough to blanch and freeze. We still have some strawberries and I am now getting raspberries, blueberries, and blackberries. Not enough to freeze yet, but enough for daily fresh eating. I've got a new batch of radishes at the two week mark and I want to get some more kohlrabi in the ground. My garlic is just about ready to pull.

I am trying not to spend things, but DH left his phone in Alaska, and since he is job hunting he can't be without a phone and it needs to be the number on his resumes, so he ended up getting a new phone. I mean, his old phone is five or six years old, so it's not like he wasn't due one, but I didn't want to sign a new contract in case he is out of work for a while and we need to drop down to one phone. He did get a dumb phone, not a smart phone, so it wasn't too expensive, but it was still $130 we wouldn't have needed to spend if he'd not left it behind.

I am trying not to be frustrated with him, but the time before that he left his driver's license and credit card at work, so he had to get a new license, because he was having to drive his parents to Seattle and back for follow up cancer stuff. It wasn't a case where he could just not drive for the ten days he was home. Fortunately he has a passport, so he could fly home. But it's just carelessness leading to having to spend money and it drives me crazy.

Also he keeps wanting to make all these little purchases like things are normal. I mean, I know he gets it, he's the one who will be out of a job soon, but at the same time he isn't changing his habits and he's being forgetful to the detriment of our budget. These things add up and suddenly there is $300 to $400 worth of stuff the last two months that shouldn't have needed to be gotten. I am really having to fight with myself to not make retaliation purchases, because that way lies madness and credit card debt. But I want to, and I haven't wanted to in a long, long time, so I hate that it is coming up.

I really hope he gets a job offer soon. This stuff is making me far too anxious.

So it has finally been announced that company 2 has gotten the contract at Big Company and they were signing the paperwork today. Company 2 is the one that supposedly said they would hire DH, and used his name for his position in their bid paperwork. So I guess this is a smidgeon of progress. No offer yet for DH, but that could be weeks away.

A more optimistic me would find this promising, but I am not a more optimistic me. I am a completely and totally cynical me. As in I'll believe it when I see it, but not before.

I'd still rather he work one county over, but at this point, any job is better than no job. I am dreading having to pay for COBRA. It is going to be so freaking expensive. Dreading having to meet a yearly deductible all over again if he does get a new job and new insurance, too. However COBRA and living expenses will wipe out our EF in 4 to 5 months, so new job and new insurance and new deductible is the better option. But ugh.

We are not all that much better off than we were when I last wrote on DH's impending lay off on the 2nd. But he did have several people from his company and from big parent company go to the higher ups (on their own) and tell them they'd made the wrong decision on who to lay off.

So now they've reversed the decision, but it doesn't mean much. DH's company has announced that they did not get the contract. Their contract ends at the end of the month. Then they have so many days to finish up and hand over things to whomever did get the contract. So that means DH will go back at the end of the month and get at least another two weeks wages, which will cover medical for July, too, so we at least won't have to do a COBRA for July.

After that there may or may not be more wrap-up work. They have 90 days, but whether or not there is 90 days of work is anybody's guess.

It has still not been announced whether or not company 2 got the contract. With a short list of 2 and company 1 being told they do not have it, it should be a given, but nothing is official. Until it is official, DH can't be offered a position there, though he supposedly has one as they used his name in the bid for that position.

He will be having a meeting with the placement company when he gets home and I think he said he's been submitted for the next county over job, but they won't be ramping up to hire for another month or so. That would be the ideal job, though, and he'd be back home working a normal day job.

He's sent his resume in to a job in North Dakota as well. Not my first choice and it would be 4 weeks on, 2 weeks off.

Right now I am continuing to budget as usual. I am funding my funds with the idea that any and all money saved will be used to live on if it comes to that. But if it doesn't come to that then they'll have continued to grow.

I have been getting my ducks in a row and stocking up on staples like flour, sugar, rice, toilet paper, and cleaning products. Most other things I have a good supply of for a while. I still have a lot of home canned food from last year and the garden is in full swing right now, with the veggies of course, but the raspberries, blackberries, and even the blueberries are starting to ripen, while the strawberries are at full bore. The freezer's are full of meat and if it comes down to it, I shouldn't have to buy any food for 3 or 4 months.

I have lots of beef fat and pork fat to render into tallow and lard, so I will have cooking oil from that if I run out of my stockpile of olive oil and sunflower oil. Plus, I always filter and save my bacon grease, too, as it is the best thing to cook rabbit meat in.

I know we will be okay for some time no matter what the outcome, but I am still struggling with the uncertainty of not knowing what comes next. It is hard to not have things nailed down.

Please continue to pray that my husband will find a new, good job. Thanks for all the support. I really appreciate it.

DH called last night to say he's been laid off at the end of this hitch. So he's got a little less than two weeks and he's out of a job. Even if his company ends up getting the contract, they've decided to combine too many positions and DH's is being combined with another one that is up a couple of levels that he doesn't have that particular experience for.

There is still no news on who won that contract. If the other company does, he supposedly has a job, but I'm starting to wonder if that contract will ever be awarded. Since big company has been dragging its feet for so long now, it makes me wonder if they aren't changing their minds altogether and shutting that project down and don't want to announce it yet.

With gas prices on the upswing though, that doesn't seem as likely. I mean we're back to an average of around $2.60 a gallon around here. Still, it is kind of what I feel in the back of my mind.

DH has a couple of job leads and he's applying for his TWIC card, which a lot of people who work for refineries must have, so it'll be in place as soon as possible. The one job lead that I really, really hope for is a two year contract at a refinery one county over.

This husband and wife team that he used to work with at two previous companies, the wife works for the company who fills jobs for this and other similar companies and she is passing on his resume for this position. It would have way better insurance (only $100 per person, so $400 a month instead of $900) and actually a higher pay rate and we'd only have the cost of commuting a round trip of 60 miles instead of having to pay for air fare and an overnight in a hotel.

But first he'd have to get an interview, then interview, then he'd have to get the job, and right now all it is is passing along a resume with a super strong recommendation from the woman sending it along, who is the one responsible for putting forth candidates. And it might not even start right away so it could be a couple months out even if he did get it. It is near where we were looking at some farms. It would be perfect, but
I refuse to get my hopes up.

So I need you to pray for us if you do so. While we have enough money to live on for quite some time between the Emergency Fund and the Farm Down Payment Fund, having to do that would set all of our financial goals back a long time, plus having to pay COBRA for our medical will make it go a lot faster.

DH will apply for unemployment the day he gets home. It won't be much, nowhere near what he actually makes, but he's certainly paid enough into it for the last 30 years, so we will take what they have to give us. Anything that will stretch the money in savings is good. I am just so very grateful that we are not in debt. All of the work that we did paying it off was worth it for feeling like we'll survive for a while now.

DH texted me to say he might only be coming home for one week instead of two. There's a good chance he will get a week of overtime, which would be great for our finances when so much is up in the air. It means we can sock some more money into the Down Payment Fund.

Fortunately it would be the second week and not the first week he's coming home, as FIL goes in for surgery on the 23rd and DH needs to drive him to Seattle for it. DH had planned to bring him back home, too, but FIL has to be in the hospital for five days, so he'd have to go back before that time.

I'm not really capable of driving to Seattle and back on the same day. My leg will go into severe spasm and I'd likely be unable to walk for 3 or 4 days afterwards without assistance. I also tend to get super tense and freaked out in Seattle traffic. They drive like crazy people there. It's worse than California between LAX and Disneyland, which is saying something. We'll figure something out.

I did a one hour water aerobics class this morning. It was a different teacher from usual. She is the Wednesday teacher. I've never done a Wednesday class before. She does a lot more stretching stuff than the other teachers. Which is good for flexibility, but doesn't get the heart rate up for as long.

I am debating on going to a class tomorrow or not. My body really feels like it needs a rest, but I won't be able to go on Thursday because my son has his standardized testing that day and someone has to be with him and DH doesn't get home until later in the day. But I could go swimming Thursday evening instead of a class. My foot is kind of hurting so swimming would be easier on it than water aerobics.

But also tomorrow is the water Zumba class and it is only twice a week, so if I don't go tomorrow, I won't get to do it again until Monday. Well, I guess I'll see how I feel in the morning.