My last payment to the medical debt has posted. The remining balance is now at $145,903.32. YTD interest paid on this debt is $5,628.83. Ouch!

I am finally getting around to posting the bills I paid from last week's paycheck.

$910.37 Medical Mortgage
$400.00 House Mortgage
$282.22 Propane
$201.89 Comcast (installation charges on top of cable/phone/internet)
$ 44.58 Garbage (2 months)
$ 71.36 Cell phone
$ 84.00 Herald
$445.00 MBNA MC#1
$110.00 Power
$ 50.00 Physical Therapy
$185.50 Car insurance (3 months)

A fair chunk of change going out, there. Tomorrow is payday again, but not like this one. This is the big one for the month and has a full seven days of wages on it. Tomorrow's pay usually only has one and a half days on it. This time it will be two and a half days on it with the new schedule change, and it will be like that from now on. The first payday will have 4.5 days on it instead of 5.5 days, so the difference is at both ends of the cycle. Then we have one week where he doesn't get paid at all, out of every four.

I'm glad the vacation money is taken care of now. And the association dues, which I thought were due at the end of June are actually due at the end of July, so that makes me happy.

I decided to make a proper entry in answer to some comments left on my last post about my medical debt, because it just got too long to be a comment.

No, the hospital will not negotiate any further. As it is, my parents put their house up for collateral against this debt because mine wasn't worth that amount of money. If I fail to pay on the debt my parents would have to so it is something I have to be very conscientious about.

I have never been one to walk away from my debt, no matter how tempting or how much easier it would have made my life to do so. And it will get paid, either over the course of the next twenty odd years or when my parents die and I inherit the house and sell it. Even if the house is sold for medical care the mortgage would be paid off first as the oldest debt and then I'd just pay back the surviving parent free of interest. It is more likely they will die before I can pay it off since Dad is 72 or 73 (can't ever remember if he's 5.5 years older than Mom or 4.5) and Mom is nearly 68. But that's obviously not the option I prefer! I want my folks around as long as possible.

My parents wanted to cash out their IRA and pay it and just have me pay them $1000 a month interest free until the remainder of the debt was paid down, since they have enough in CD's to live off the interest plus the thousand, but since their IRA was made from a never taxed pension the penalty would have been enormous. So that didn't happen.

Mom says that when Dad dies she can then cash out the IRA without penalty and pay it off and then me pay her the rest of what is owed interest free. Another route I don't really want to go.

Well, it'll get paid and I'm feeling better today about it. Yesterday was just really hard.

I received the statement for my medical debt balance today. I am now at $146,322.80 left to pay off from a beginning balance of $155,000. Out of the last payment $702.13 went to interest and $208.24 went to principal. Well, at least principal has finally hit the $200 point. It seemed like that day would never come. I am grateful this debt is at 5.75% and that at least progress is being made now, no matter how little. Of course, when I see that YTD interest has been $4227.57 it makes me feel awful.

I know this debt was a necessary debt. I know that I am lucky to be alive today. I am grateful that the insurance did cover some of the three and a half year ordeal and that the hospital cut the remaining $310,000 in half. But some days when I see that balance and how much is wasted on interest it makes me want to cry. It is hard. I get so angry at my body for betraying me the way it did, for not staying healthy and strong.

It is overwhelming. It makes me want to scream. Or punch my hand through the wall. Or some other destructive thing like go on a shopping spree with a credit card. I won't do that. But the fact that I want to is a major red flag.

I try very hard to maintain a positive outlook in my life. Some days it is obviously easier to do so. This isn't one of them.

After the most recent payment on the medical debt, my balance there is now down to $146,531.04. Sometimes I don't ever think I will make much of a dent in this, but it is going down. I am grateful it is at 5.75 percent and not 18 or some other awful higher number. Steps are being made. Now just over $200 a month is going onto principal and just a little over $700 is going to interest. When I started paying this down it was closer to $50 a month to principal.

It is a slow process but it is nice to see that finally a bit of progress is being made this year. It will happen. It is just taking time.

It has really been bothering me that I wasn't able to send in extra principle on the medical mortgage this month. The regular payment is $910 and change but I always, since the beginning have sent in $1000. So after the tough month of January is over, I am going to make mortgage payments of $1010 for the next year. Not just for the next 9 months which would be the $90, but for twelve, because I imagine not paying the $90 extra this month makes more damage than replacing it $10 at a time can make up for. I wish I could make up for it next month by adding an additional $100 but that's not an option.

I will have to make the straight payment on my house mortgage, too this month I think. But that is only a difference of almost $25. If I can, I will squeak it out, if I can't, I will add it onto the next payment.

Today has been a good day. I got all of my errands accomplished, though I think I must have hit the slowest drive-thru bank tellers in the history of the universe. And all I was doing was making a deposit! I didn't even need cash back. The easiest task for them to perform and despite being there first (it was a 3 lane drive thru) I was fifth out of six cars served because I chose the lane with the drawer and not the ones with the tubes. So I had to wait for the girl to press the button to open the door for me to get my deposit slip and check in it, despite having pressed the teller call button twice. Which she might have done earlier if she hadn't run off three times. The other teller seemed preoccupied with filling up the candy basket. Hello, last banking night before a big holiday weekend, get your act together. End rant.

But I got all the various monies transferred to my checking account and I mailed off the check for the Medical Mortgage. This is the first time ever that I have not paid extra towards the principle. I hate that, but this month couldn't be helped. When I pay the house mortgage next week it'll be the same thing. Ugh. But after that it'll go back to normal.

I was going to drop off my house insurance payment at the local office today, but the lazy bums closed at four instead of five today for the holiday weekend, so I had to mail it. I'm not happy about that, I prefer to do as many bills in person as possible but oh, well, what can you do?

I received a check from Your2Cents and deposited that into the vacation savings account, along with the ones and rolled coin. So the total deposit was $41.50, bringing the amount in that account to $61.50.

I can't remember if I wrote about his before or not. I have the opportunity to go to a convention for my support group for my disease in May and it is a tight knit group so it is going to be fun. Some of us will be arriving a day early to go to Disneyland for one day and I am hoping to be one of them.

I do not have to pay for airfare as DH has plenty of miles, so I just have to come up with the hotel fee and the park pass money. I can have a roommate to cut the costs and I may do so. DH's schedule works out so that he will be home to watch the kids. So if I can get the money saved it will all fall into place.